tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH's topics - tribe.net

Today!

2009-04-01T15:50:18Z

3/10/2009

Perish Newz from The Bishipp
Almost time to don thy wierd apparel, find a sign that fits your mood,collect the stray pennies from beneath the couch,round up the solo socks and the losing lottery tickets and think about thinking about the one hole-y day obligation that you have as unavoidable members of the world's oldest religion, the world's largest church....the First Church of the Last Laugh.

You're human?...your in it. Might as well show up and find out why this parade,the

31st ANNUAL ST. STUPID'S DAY PARADE

, won't go away.

This year it's the weekday parade route on the sidewalk from the EMBARCADERO PLAZA thru the financial district with stops at the 'stations of stupid' for the time honored rituals and traditions so beloved by the people down at the bureau of rituals and traditions. Givin the annual sub text (there's a sub in every parade), that of giving homage to the buisness of religion and the religion of buisness,this year promises extra fun in the concrete canyons of greed and deceit. Stick the head of your favorite overpaid ceo on a stick (and the amount of his/her crime)....bring PINK SLIPS and EVICTION NOTICES for the HQs of the not so free market...print your own money for bail outs, pay offs and buy ins. Fun for all ages! Drums and other noise production devices encouraged. Attend at your own risk. Watch your step. Spread the word.

Free lunch. RAIN OR SHINE. War and peace. free!! Hotcha!

Wednesday, Noon, April 1th, foot of Market st. SF. Ca. USA

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

TOMORROW - EMBARCADERO!!!

2008-03-31T19:32:40Z

Don't go to the pointy building... you'll feel really stupid.

Back to Justin Herman Plaza!

Noon - don't be late!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Soundtrack for stupidity

2007-10-03T00:18:38Z

A Season In Hell #13: Theme From A Season In Hell

Sometimes I get nostalgic. I moved a lot in my life, an average of once every two years. I went to ten schools in thirteen years (K-12), and the one thing that was a constant was music. Music and TV. The two things that were constant were music and TV. And family. The three…three things that were constant were music, TV, family and the ever increasing amount of sarcasm that made it into my humor.

I made it down for the weekly KFJC (http://kfjc.org) staff meeting this past week, for the first time in about seven years. I’m hoping to do a show a month there. I’ll keep you posted.

With that I bring you this latest episode. If you’re a fan of nighttime police dramas, then you’ll enjoy this show.

Also, I recently saw Radio Moscow play 12 Galaxies in SF (http://www.12galaxies.com/flash.html). Check out their MySpace page, and support live music. I also have a few San Francisco artists in this show, including punk polka faves Polkacide, the Japanese yodeling cowboy Toshio Hirano, and Sesame Street cover band Cookie Mongoloid; you’ve never heard anything like them before.

Check out my podomatic site here: http://johnhell.podomatic.com
My MySpace site here: http://myspace.com/mrjohnhell
My new Facebook site here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=616519637
My blog here: http://freeradiosf.com/blog/22

Whew, that’s a lot of crap I have online.

Email me at mrjohnhell@yahoo.com

Thanks for listening.

Set list:

Barney Miller Theme, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
http://www.amazon.com/Televisions-Greatest-Hits-Vol-70s/dp/B000000GOO
Beer is Better Than Girls Are: Artless
http://krucoff.com/2006/04/top-music-9-artless-band-of-mykel.html
In Heaven There Is No Beer: Polkacide http://www.polkacide.com/
Jump In Line: Harry Belafonte http://www.belafonte-asiteofsites.com/

Up & Down: Cookie Mongoloid http://www.wearemongoloid.com/cookie/index.html
Sanford & Son Theme, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
T For Texas: Toshio Hirano http://www.toshiohirano.com/
25 Minutes To Go: Johnny Cash http://www.johnnycash.com/

James Brown Ate My Bagpipe: Taxi Chain http://www.taxichain.com/
Street of San Francisco, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
Psychobilly Freakout: Reverend Horton Heat http://www.reverendhortonheat.com/

Fuse: Radio Moscow http://www.myspace.com/radiomoscow
Pick Me Up: Dinosaur Jr. http://www.dinosaurjr.com/

Morning Theft: Jeff Buckley http://www.jeffbuckley.com/
Barretta Theme, from Television's Greatest Hits, Vol. 3: 70's & 80's
Theme From Cyrano/Mr. Tambourine Man: William Shatner
http://www.williamshatner.com/
Up In Smoke Reprise: Cheech & Chong http://www.cheechandchong.com/

Music bed: Zabriskie Point. Brought to you by The Pink Floyd, in memory of Michelangelo Antonioni, dead at 94, on Monday, July 30, 2007
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zabriskie_Point_(film)

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

You look stupid. This sounds stupid

2007-07-28T23:00:43Z

http://johnhell.podomatic.com

I'm stupid.

A Season In Hell #12: Waiting for the Man

***Warning*** Because of the need for server space, I will be removing Episode #1 and possibly #2 by Thursday, August 2nd, 2007. You have been warned.

I spent a year in DC last week. I was there for an education conference, and I had the luxury of seeing the New York Dolls perform at the legendary 9:30 Club. The club has been open since the 70’s, but obviously in a very different location. What a great club; amazing sound and stage. The Dolls were incredible too. Only Sylvain and Johanson are alive from the original lineup, but the rest of the band seriously kicked ass. They have a new CD out, go get it.

I got to walk “The Mall”, which is the federal gov’t area. Quite impressive, even if you don’t like the schmuck who lives in the white house right now.

This week I include some early NY Dolls. I also have some live tracks from Tom Waits with the Kronos Quartet doing the theme to my favorite show: “The Wire”. If you haven’t seen this great police drama on HBO, you’re missing the best written show on TV. Some live Lou Reed shows up near the end of the podcast today. A real rarity is included in the guise of Neil Young. He never released “Chrome Dreams”, but all of the music made it on to something eventually. This version of “Powderfinger” never did.

I hope you enjoy the show. Please leave a comment on the website: http://johnhell.podomatic.com and tell your friends about thee show by clicking the “send to friends” link on the page.

Thanks.

John Hell

Set List:

“Way Down In The Hole”: Tom Waits & Kronos Quartet with Greg Cohen on bass.
From the “Healing the Divide” release.
Get the CD here: http://www.amazon.com/Healing-Divide-Concert-Peace-Reconciliation/dp/B000F3AJTO

“Looking for a Kiss”: New York Dolls http://www.nydolls.org/
“A Change is Gonna Come”: The Gits http://www.thegits.com/
“Senorita”: Ovarian Trolley http://www.trouserpress.com/entry.php?a=ovarian_trolley

“Powderfinger”: Neil Young, from the unreleased “Chrome Dreams”. Get it here: http://www.tapecity.org/showthread.php?t=7626&highlight=chrome+dreams
You have to register for this site, which is free.
“The Mercy Seat”: Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds http://www.nickcaveandthebadseeds.com/
“Do You Take This Man?”: Diamanda Galas http://www.diamandagalas.com/

“Shady Lane”: Slim Cessna’s Auto Club http://www.slimcessnasautoclub.com/news/index.asp
“Home Sweet Mobile Home”: The New Duncan Imperials http://www.newduncanimperials.com/

“Ain’t No Friend Of Mine:” Mono Men http://www.monomen.net/
“I’m Waiting For My Man”: Lou Reed, 12-26-72 http://www.loureed.org/00/index.html

“I Want You”: Peter Frampton & Toto http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sgt._Pepper's_Lonely_Hearts_Club_Band_(film)
“Up In Smoke Reprise”: Cheech & Chong http://www.cheechandchong.com/

As always, if you’re interested in any of my live music, I’m always up for a trade. Take a look at my list, and send me an email at mrjohnhell@yahoo.com

The live list: http://db.etree.org/johnhell

Support live and local music!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

A Season In Hell #7

2007-05-31T21:38:09Z

It's that time once again my friends. I give to you all A Season In Hell #7: The Art of Getting Jumped.

There's a lot packed into this show:
Presidential Speeches
Presidential Singing
Jim Fourniadis doing his best Keith Moon impersonation
Public Enemy soaking up the whipped cream
and a lesson or two to boot.

As usual, if you're not already checking out the show through iTunes, you can go to my homepage here:
http://johnhell.podomatic.com

Or subscribe through iTunes here:
http://johnhell.podOmatic.com/rss2.xml

On my homepage please click the "Send to friends" link and email my show to everyone you know, even grandma likes this stuff.

Thanks so much for supporting my fanatical devotion/obsession to music and the strong desire I horde sharing it with.

Email me at mrjohnhell@yahoo.com
http://www.myspace.com/mrjohnhell

Read my blog here:
http://freeradio.com/blog/22

Support live music in your neighborhood.

Enjoy.

jh

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

A Season In Hell #6

2007-05-24T22:20:47Z

Howdy "radio" fans.

A Season In Hell, Episode 6 is up and ready for your
enjoyment.

Thanks for listening. It's not radio, but at least I
get to feed my jones a little bit. I really appreciate
Podomatic. They make it incredibly easy.

See the website here:
http://johnhell.podomatic.com

Subscribe to it through iTunes here:
http://johnhell.podOmatic.com/rss2.xml

Tell your friends that Hell is here to stay.

jh

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

A Season In Hell #5

2007-05-18T19:16:43Z

A Season In Hell #5(Don’t Worry) If There’s A Hell Below We’re All Gonna Go

You can hear my latest podcast online here:
http://johnhell.podomatic.com/

Or you can get it on your iTunes or other online music player here:
http://johnhell.podOmatic.com/rss2.xml

This week I start off the show highlighting local San Francisco band Pebble Theory. They’re a great four piece that puts on a tantalizing live show. They’re having a CD release party at Bottom of the Hill in SF, on Saturday, May 26th. Check out their new CD “Air”. Also, you can check them out online at http://pebbletheory.com, and on Myspace at http://myspace.com/pebbletheory

The Finklestein Shit Kid: Cheech & Chong
Up in Smoke: Cheech & Chong
Air: Pebble Theory

Animal: Pebble Theory
Picabo Who?: Free Kitten
Sugar Kane: Sonic Youth

Steppin’ In Her I. Miller Shoes: Betty Davis
(Don’t Worry) If There’s A Hell Below We’re All Gonna Go: Curtis Mayfield
Consternation: Erik Friedlander

Redebe: Johnny Dyani
Green River: Creedence Clearwater Revival
History Lesson-Part II: Minutemen
Love Whip: Reverend Horton Heat

Step Right Up: Tom Waits
Auf Wiedersehen: Cheap Trick
Up In Smoke Reprise: Cheech & Chong

Enjoy.

John Hell

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

ST Stupids V 3.0 (Cavalcade of Talent) thanks to the band...

2007-04-11T14:48:01Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AIH1n1Xduk

Also special thanks to Ruby and the Maximums.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Boomba Boomba view of the Parade down Columbus

2007-04-08T19:41:05Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAU-AeB51lk

Lots of Boomba goodness.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

pink shots

2007-04-02T16:22:55Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNl4IqqdRyw

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Not the stupidest day of the year...

2007-04-02T04:14:05Z

but one of the most fun!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWKUaBCUBPw

also some pix:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/amor2c/sets/72157600041065404/

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

where are we starting this year???

2007-03-29T02:59:25Z

I'll be there with a smile my bunny ears, and my drum....
but where should I meet up with everyone?

where do we start?
and when??

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 3 replies

Hippy barthday!

2006-05-27T01:47:43Z

Bishop Joeeeyyyyyyy!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 4 replies

Sermon in the park

2006-04-10T02:03:07Z

http://www.archive.org/download/GhostModernSFStStupidsDaySanFrancisco20060401/StStupidsDay20060401.mov

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Pictures?

2006-04-10T00:14:35Z

Did anyone get any pictures of this stupid day? I was on stilts and was unable to take any.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 2 replies

2 days to go!

2006-04-01T06:43:11Z

So my dad found an alternate spot in case Washington Square Park is too muddy, he got NEW t-shirts printed, and everything is coming together nicely.

Make sure you bring a St. Stupid Virgin to the parade!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 4 replies

state of stupidity

2006-03-31T22:13:27Z

sat. apr. 1st, 4:20 p.m. after the St. Stupids Day parade, the president
declares , "State of Stupidity" @ ACE junkyard 2555 mckinnon is sf.
featuring Evolution Control Committee, Mongoloid, Cyclecide Bike Rodeo,
Fluff Grrl, Jesus Fucking Christ, Violent Discharge, Deranged Pussy,
North of Penguin, Esmereleda Strange, Bishop Joey, Doctor Hal, Professor
David Apocalypse, Michael Pepe, Rock Star Bar w/ Flash and Victoria, DJ
Fox, DJ BigDaddy, the Tamale Dude + MORE! for more info go to
www.cyclecide.com

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Broadside Announcements

2006-03-30T22:25:09Z

Good to see preMarch hype manifesting on Valencia:

http://images.tribe.net/tribe/upload/photo/d85/88b/d8588b4f-5571-4176-ad34-6161b20dc5e4

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Hah!

2006-03-23T05:27:42Z

Less than a month to go!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 10 replies

Bishop Joey with Joan Baez, Reverend Billy...at Hurricane Katrina Memorial in BRC

2006-03-05T22:45:42Z

http://ia300135.us.archive.org/1/items/Joan_Baez_with_Rev._Billy_Bishop_Joey_in_songs_of_support_for_victims_of_Hurricane_Katrina/RevBillJoanBaezKatrinaMemBurningMan2K5.mov

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

New Orleans uses Mardi Gras to lampoon Katrina response

2006-02-14T08:25:00Z

http://breakingnews.iol.ie/news/story.asp?j=172492744&p=y7z49345x

12/02/2006 - 12:49:39

The first Mardi Gras parade since Hurricane Katrina marched through the French Quarter of New Orleans pulling carts with blue tarpaulins, effigies of Mayor Ray Nagin and Governor Kathleen Blanco and floats with themes such as “Give Me That Mould Time Religion".

The Krewe du Vieux, one of the carnival’s earliest parades which is known for satire, lampooned Katrina and public officials blamed for the bungled response to the catastrophe in their parade Saturday themed “C’est Levee,” a play on the French phrase meaning “that’s life".

Mardi Gras has long been an occasion for the city to laugh at tragedy and aim barbs at authorities. Given all the pain New Orleans has suffered in the past year, the irreverence should reach new heights this season.

“It is hard living here now. We need to have our opportunity to release,” said organiser Keith Twitchell. “If you don’t laugh, you’re dead. There’s a lot to cry about here.”

One display asked France to buy Louisiana back, suggesting the state might get better treatment than it has from the American government. Another float was themed “Fridge Over Troubled Water.” In place of a parade map, the Krewe du Vieux had a “projected path” adorned with a swirly hurricane symbol.

Still, in the midst of revelry and satire, even the city known as the Big Easy has a serious side.

The Zulu Social Aid & Pleasure Club, a 90-year-old historically black group that holds one of the city’s most beloved parades, held a service and lit 10 candles in honour of club members who have died since the storm. An eleventh was lit to honour the hundreds of people killed by Katrina.

Mardi Gras parades typically run on weekends leading up to and on Mardi Gras, which falls on February 28 this year, almost exactly six months after the August 29 storm. The parades are put on by private clubs across the city; Krewe du Vieux is a smaller French Quarter parade that runs in advance of the major parades.

Masked riders in the parades have long used the opportunity to mock the ruling class and government officials, said Mardi Gras expert Arthur Hardy. The tradition goes back to 1873, when the Mistick Krewe of Comus themed its parade “The Missing Links to Darwin’s Origin of the Species” and portrayed Union General Ulysses S. Grant as a tobacco grub.

Hardy said the satire serves as a coping mechanism.

“It’s almost like you laugh to keep from crying. It’s chance to say ‘This can’t keep us down,”’ he said.

Even groups that are typically less tongue-in-cheek are taking swipes at the storm and politicians this year.

The Krewe of Carrollton, which holds its parade on February 19, chose the theme “Blue Roof Blues” – a reference to the tarpaulins protecting damaged and leaky roofs. The Krewe of Mid-City will use blue tarpaulins along the bottom of its floats – in part out of necessity because of flooding at its warehouse.

The Mid-City parade, scheduled for February 26, will have floats called “New Orleans Culture” – that’s culture as in mould – and “I drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was gone,” a bitter twist on the line from Don McLean’s American Pie.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

2006 ST. STUPID'S DAY

2006-01-18T20:38:03Z

So... it's on a Saturday this year... starts at the pointy building and goes up columbus to washington square park for the stage show and blessing.

Sister Lolita Me Into Temptation asked for some ritual time on the stage for the Sisters.... if anyone else has anything they really gotta do on stage at St. Stupid's Day you should ask my dad now.

Think ahead people - it takes a lot of planning to be this stupid.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 9 replies

The Buddha on Stupidity

2005-12-01T20:13:40Z

When all the myriad streams that flow in different places, each with its own color and taste, enter the great ocean, they blend and become just one taste, with one name. In the same way, stupidity and wisdom both become one in the awakened mind. When one first starts along the path, there seems to be a distinction that this is stupidity and that is wisdom. But later, when one penetrates more deeply, one finds there is no difference between stupidity and wisdom.

-Visuddhi Magga

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 2 replies

First United Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

2005-08-12T15:32:43Z

Ah hem (clears throat) seems there is a new snack religion on the scene.

http://www.venganza.org/

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 2 replies

Three Day Stubble Show, August 18th!!!

2005-08-09T20:14:18Z

Three Day Stubble Show, August 18th!!!

Bottom of the Hill
1233 17th Street (17th @ Missouri)
San Francisco, CA 94107

Info line: 415-621-4455
Thu, August 18 10 : 00 pm (doors at 8:30)
$5
25 Year Anniversary Show
Three Day Stubble
Experimental Dental School
Bludtfart

Three Day Stubble will feature many members of the past in this 25th anniversary celebration, a treat not to be missed.
Experimental Dental School with Shoko Horikawa on organ and sampler, Ryan Chittick on drums, and Jesse Hall on guitar and vocals, the distorted Oakland, California trio Experimental Dental School began to carve a solid niche in the Bay Area's thriving art rock scene in early 2002.
Bludtfart celebrates the ideal of EuroTrash futurism through unorthodox instrumentation, cardboard, plastic items used with electronica keyboards, drums and guitar. All members have something better to do, be it Rubber O' Cement,
the PatchKordzz, San Francisco Burlesque Orquestra and more. Bludtfart occupies the rest of their time like a hangnail. Songs regularly performed include Trans Europe Express, Cars, Poke Salet Annie and our original hit, Space Goul.
We're not averse to doing rock operas.
"Let Your Morsel Find its Way!"

http://threedaystubble.com/

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 5 replies

sausage carving

2005-07-26T20:06:19Z

http://www.nipponham.co.jp/winny/kazari/

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

Pass the mitre

2005-07-19T18:50:24Z

Can we all chip together, and get Bishop Joey a nice avatar for Xmas?

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 12 replies

Today's Pink Section!

2005-07-11T20:50:47Z

There's a photo of my dad as Dick Cheney (and Amos as Dubya) - it's in the back in the theater listings.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 2 replies

Mexican Super Hero Figures

2005-07-02T02:22:35Z

http://www.bootlegactionfigures.com/plasticmexicanfigures.html

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 4 replies

My Dad is a Dick!

2005-06-27T19:31:30Z

Dick Cheney that is...

THE DICK & DUBYA SHOW
The Republican Outreach Cabaret

with AMOS GLICK and ED HOLMES
from the SAN FRANCISCO MIME TROUPE
directed bt BILLY ALLARD of DUCK'S BREATH MYSTERY THEATER

COMEDY, MUSIC and Q&A
"A wonderfully clueless president (Glick) and a no nonsense Dick Cheney (Holmes)" - SF Chronicle

Johnny Steele opens!

Friday and Saturday July 8th and 9th
8pm
142 Throckmorton, Mill Valley
www.142throckmortontheatre.com
415 383 9600

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

it's so silent!

2005-06-21T16:58:56Z

ssssssssssssssssssssssh!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 7 replies

Flash Gordon, MD

2005-06-20T20:44:10Z

I'd just like to give a big public thank you to Dr. Flash... and if any of you need a doctor for anything - he's the First Church of the Last Laugh preferred medical care provider! His office number is 461-2262.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

Parade Pics?

2005-04-12T15:34:01Z

I had a great time at the parade this year, but did not bring a camera... Are their any shutter bugs willing to post links and or upload to the tribe?
-Laird

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 4 replies

Where was everyone?

2005-04-06T03:16:35Z

No offense to all of the beautifully stupid people who attended, but I hardly knew any of you. This is the first year that I have attended where I knew only about a dozen folks. We brought our daughter and everything. You people are sooooo stuuuupid. See you next year.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 4 replies

usoutofsf.com

2005-04-01T08:03:32Z

Here's a video that includes footage from the signing of the declaration:

http://www.davisfordistrict5.org/Video/DeclareyourIndependence.mov

The Ballot measure was certified by the City Attorney and given an
official Title and Summary. It takes about 10,000 signatures to get it
on the ballot. Or, 4 Supervisors .- Josh

"The Free City of San Francisco?"--check out:

http://www.usoutofsf.com

"Amongst [the] many general abuses [the US] has
suborned and denied the sovereign will of the citizens
of the City of San Francisco in five critical ways:

Against our firm resolve to not persecute its wars of
aggression, it has utilized our taxes for these
purposes, recruited the youth of our city to fight in
its armies, moved war materials through our port,
contaminated our land, and has failed in its
acknowledged duty to recover the damages done.
Against our decision and progressive implementation of
a model system for administering medical marijuana, a
plant recognized in providing safe and effective
relief from a variety of conditions, and in opposition
to the mutual wishes of physicians and patients, it
has raided, arrested, and prosecuted individuals and
groups acting in full compliance with state and local
law.
It has chosen to stand against the general desires of
the people of San Francisco and the executive action
of its Mayor in attempting to limit marriage and its
multitude of benefits to heterosexuals to the degree
of consideration and proposal of a Constitutional
Amendment.
In violation of its own Constitution, it has
instituted the PATRIOT Act, trampling on the basic
rights of due process and privacy, further weakening
the already limited freedoms of speech, inquiry,
association, and legal representation. Without warrant
or witness, crimes against the common citizen can be
pursued under the guise of National Security, claiming
the name of justice but without evidence of cause. We,
the people of San Francisco, have repudiated this act
and its administration through the resolution of the
Board of Supervisors and the direct vote of the
people, instructing non-compliance by city civil
servants who are directed to refer PATRIOT act
requests to the Board of Supervisors for decision,
thereby placing our citizens in grave conflict between
performance of just and lawful actions and the illegal
actions of a more powerful state which assumes
sovereignty over us.
As a city that considers itself a member of the
international community and supports both universal
health care and the International Declaration of Human
Rights, the disregard of the United States of America
for the welfare of its own people stands in strong
contradiction to both our own principles of a just
society and to international understandings we share
with the remainder of the world.
We, therefore, as representatives of the United
Neighborhoods of San Francisco, in general congress
assembled, appealing to the peoples of the world and
their communities for the rectitude of our intentions,
do, in the name, and by the authority of the good
people of this city, solemnly publish and declare:
that these United Neighborhoods are, and of right
ought to be, a free and independent city; that they
are absolved from all allegiance to the US corporate
crown; and that all political connection between them
and the United States of America, is, and ought to be,
totally dissolved; and that as a free and independent
city, these United Neighborhoods have full power to
levy peace, conclude war, contract alliances,
establish commerce, and to do all other acts and
things which independent states may of right do. And
for the support of this Declaration, with a firm
reliance on the protection of Providence, we mutually
pledge to each other, our lives, our fortunes and our
sacred honor.

San Francisco's Declaration of Independence"

=====
NUREMBERG CHARTER, Section 2, Article 6:

. . . (a) CRIMES AGAINST PEACE: namely, planning, preparation,
initiation or waging of a war of aggression, or a war in violation of
international treaties, agreements or assurances, or participation in
a common plan or conspiracy for the accomplishment of any of the
foregoing;

(b) WAR CRIMES . . . Such violations shall include, but not be limited
to . . . murder or ill-treatment of prisoners of war . . , killing of
hostages, plunder of public or private property, wanton destruction of
cities, towns or villages, or devastation not justified by military
necessity . . .

. . . AND TO THINK HANS BLIX ASKED FOR TWO MORE MONTHS. . .

Iraq Body Count:
http://www.iraqbodycount.net/

Iraq Coalition Body Count:
http://icasualties.org/oif/

GEORGE BUSH AND MEMBERS OF HIS GOVERNMENT ARE WAR CRIMINALS! IMPEACH
BUSH NOW! STOP THE NEO-CON WAR MACHINE! RESIST WAR TAXATION!
http://www.nwtrcc.org HAUL BUSH AND HIS PROFITEERS BEFORE THE ICC!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 2 replies

under new management

2005-04-01T08:00:36Z

So the other moderator bailed, and as I'm the only child of Bishop Joey, I figured that I had better take the helm. I'm inviting more people, and as we near 2005 (destined to be the stupidest year to date) maybe we can spread the evangelical love of stupidity. Evangelicals have all the power - we should be having all the fun.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 18 replies

o canada

2005-04-01T07:47:57Z

> Canada busy sending back Bush-dodgers Tuesday
> > >
> > > The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada
> > > has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased
patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The reelection of President Bush is
prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens, who fear they'll
soon be required to hunt, pray, and agree with Bill O'Reilly. Canadian
> border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology
professors, animal rights activists, and Unitarians crossing their fields at
night.
> > >
> > > "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood
producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield,
whose acreage borders North Dakota. "The producer was cold,
exhausted, and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range
chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a
chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"
> > >
> > > In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher
fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers
that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he
said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so
> much they wouldn't give milk."
> > >
> > > Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet
liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive
> > > them across the border, and then leave them to fend for themselves.
"A ot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario
border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking
water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though."
> > >
> > > When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often
wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors
have been circulating about the Bush Administration's plan to
establish reeducation camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic
beer and watch NASCAR.
> > >
> > > In the days since the election, liberals have turned to sometimes
ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as
senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription
drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs,
Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing
the supposed senior citizen passengers. "If they can't identify the
> accordion player on 'The Lawrence Welk Show,' we get suspicious about
their age," a Canadian official said.
> > >
> > > Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are
creating an organic broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan
Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the
Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many
art-history majors does one country need?"
> > >
> > > In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada,
> Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged
that the Administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source
> close to Cheney said. "We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary
concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The
president is determined to reach out."

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 3 replies

friday friday friday

2005-03-31T15:57:54Z

Things to bring:
Socks
Pennies
Funky signs
Drums
Snacks

foot o' market - embarcadero - justin herman plaza

dont b late

high noon!

if the parade leaves w/o you it's hard to find since it doesn't go straight up market.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 2 replies

April 1st

2005-03-15T06:54:21Z

Our holy day is almost upon us - and things are shaping up for this year. It's the last weekday parade for the next few years - so whoop it up peeps.

After the parade there will be a subgenius show at 12 Galaxies - with Rube Wadell as the opener. Tasty!

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 4 replies

And I thought spirituality was dead!

2005-02-21T00:32:47Z

Thank god I have found my tribe! This is what life is all about! When we get 144,000 members we will all go to heaven. Finally I can join a church again and put the past defrocking behind me.
Can I be one of the prophets? I can be psychic when I want to.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 1 reply

BACK TO THE BASICS

2005-01-05T03:01:11Z

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/tribe/81b361a8-7976-4964-9dc1-9ce3cd691b3c?_click_path=Application%5Btribe%5D.Tribe%5B81b361a8-7976-4964-9dc1-9ce3cd691b3c%5D&r=10535

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

Wallowholics Anonomus meeting today only

2004-12-27T21:17:54Z

http://sanfrancisco.tribe.net/thread/12490337-3258-400c-8047-2d300eeccec7?tribeid=03d7f73f-bbb7-45f7-a60b-519c228a3b64&r=10535

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies

just tell me where the parade will be....

2004-12-23T03:27:55Z

And I'll be there with Drum on....

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 3 replies

Fire!!!

2004-12-11T06:54:41Z

The Crucible is seeking volunteers for upcoming events and our ever-expanding youth program. If you are interested in any of the following opportunities please email us at volunteer@thecrucible.org or call 510.444.0919 ext. 30 any time.

- Gifty Open House -
The Gifty Open House is our next big event. December 18 & 19, 2004.
We are now recruiting volunteers for various positions throughout both days of this event.
Tell your friends, family and neighbors to come down to The Crucible for this great event!

- Youth Specific Volunteers are needed -
Youth Program Volunteers will help with field trips, special youth workshops and open houses at The Crucible. Experience with children is helpful but not necessary. Field trips and workshops involve groups of young people, school groups, home-schooled groups, and after school organizations who come to watch demonstrations or try hands-on activities in welding, torch cutting, jewelry, neon, wood carving, Paper Mache, glass flameworking and more.
Responsibilities include helping students with their projects, assisting the instructor with set up and clean up, and preparing the studio for the workshops. Experience working in a studio environment is helpful but not necessary. We offer field trips about once a week which last around five hours. Workshops times vary.
Our open houses include hands-on activities such as clay working, paper making, drawing, painting, ornament making and more. Responsibilities include helping the children with activities, greeting them at front entry check-in, and escorting them in groups to watch studio demonstrations.
Please email carla@thecrucible.org for more information on upcoming youth specific events and field trips.

- Block Time Volunteers -
Got some time in your schedule? Block Time volunteers are the backbone of the volunteer program; you commit to a regular shift, about 3-5 hours a week. Sample projects include tool room staffing, general office, program support and technology projects.
As a block-time volunteer, you'll be assigned to a Crucible staff person who will work with you and supervise your time. Not only will you see the nuts and bolts about how this innovative organization runs, you'll be directly contributing to the success of The Crucible, and the hours you work will be logged toward program discounts.

The Crucible is seeking a Volunteer Coordinator

Role Description
The Crucible's volunteer program, which has provided opportunities for more than 500 individuals to contribute time and energy to building the Crucible program since 1999, has one key internship available as Volunteer Coordinator.

As a Volunteer Coordinator, you will recruit and schedule volunteers for regular shifts at The Crucible and for special events, programs and projects.

In exchange for 6 hours per week of your time (hours are flexible), you can take classes in welding, metal casting, glass working, neon, jewelry, kinetics, blacksmithing, and more.

This is a non-paid trade for Crucible classes and other great benefits.

Position Responsibilities
Recruit and schedule volunteers, occasionally advertising open positions via mailing list, Craig's List, Tribe, etc.
Administer the volunteer database
Coordinate volunteers at special events (lectures, open houses, parties, etc.)
Respond weekly to correspondence about the volunteer program

For more information about the position, job responsibilities or qualifications, please send questions to volunteer@thecrucible.org

Application deadline is Dec 31, 2004

To apply
Please send a resume with cover letter indicating qualifications and interest to

Email: volunteer@thecrucible.org
(subject line: Volunteer Coordinator Position)

No phone calls please.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 5 replies

It says it all

2004-04-29T19:51:22Z

I'm not sure why it is that this seems to have such a summation of burningman but as I was walking down the street I saw on the side of the road a canoe with a flat tire.

posted in tHe FiRsT cHuRcH oF tHe LaSt LaUgH - 0 replies